Assuming that Life had thrown all the crap at me it was going to – at least until I was through chemo – I was totally unprepared for the news last night that my mother needs “immediate” heart surgery to fix damaged valves. So damaged that they cannot do the surgery via the femoral artery – which I am assuming means open heart surgery – unless there has been some technological advance I haven’t heard about.
On an 86 year old. With diabetes. In a hospital 450 miles away.
In an emotional tail spin I thrashed most of the night wondering what on earth was going to happen until around 3 am when I finally remembered that as a cancer patient I have access to the clinic social workers. If ever I needed to talk to one, now would be it.
After gathering myself to the point of reasonable functionality this morning I phoned and left a message for one of them to call me back. Which she did not long thereafter.
She affirmed that, with a compromised immune system, sitting in a distant hospital was pretty much the last thing I ought to be doing and even though the information wasn’t for me personally, gave a list of resources for someone in mom’s condition. I knew about most of them, but had no idea how to make contact, so she will print out the contact list and give it to me once we have a surgical date and find out things like whether or not mom will even be able to fly or if she will have to endure the 10 hour road trip via the health bus. How long she will be in Vancouver for recovery after surgery. Whether they will kick her to the curb and let her make her own way home or if they will discharge her to the local hospital, which I’m hoping would mean a flight home via air ambulance and follow up care at the cardiac unit here.
Right now we are in a state of stunned disbelief, but at least I have some resources to offer mom. Now to find someone to accompany her for the trip down and the immediate aftermath.
A couple of hours before I got the above news a friend gave me a piece of wisdom penned by St. Theresa of Lisieux. Little did I know how much I would need it, and how quickly.
“May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.”
Thanks Karen. That was so much needed and so much appreciated. Your timing was impeccable.