There are a number of aspects about being a person who creates things for sale. One of them is sometimes using colours that don’t…speak to you. As with this warp. I’m not a big fan of coral – it’s not ‘my’ colour. But I have this yarn and it needs to get used up, so I’m weaving with it.
Because it’s not ‘my’ colour, I can’t tell if I’ve succeeded in making something attractive. (Remember the colours are not ‘true’ in the photos.)
But I carry on in spite of that, feeling insecure in my ability to work with these colours in a meaningful way. Because being a textile designer from the thread up is a risky business. I risk my time, my materials, my…reputation…every time I push past my comfort zone and try something I’m not sure is going to succeed.
I don’t rely on others to tell me what to do – which colours to use, which weave structures, what density. I choose those things for myself. And for me, it is that – shall we call it – acceptance of responsibility – that makes someone a ‘master’ or not.
I think for myself. I may, at times, check in with someone else if I feel they are more informed than I am about something, but ultimately it is my judgement that needs to be used. So I have to know as much as possible about my materials (and equipment and processes).
My successes and failures are mine alone. I do not blame someone else because I was following their instructions. I study the materials (by sampling), I make my best guess, I try it.
And I do fail. Sometimes spectacularly. But when I succeed – I’ve learned something then, too.
And that is mastery. It is not relying on others to tell you what to do. It is thinking for yourself. It is pushing beyond your comfort zone, your level of knowledge – in order to learn more.
So yes, it is risky. But every day I learn something I didn’t know before. Like the fact that coral and tomato red kind of looks ok – even to my eye, that doesn’t really ‘like’ those colours individually, never mind together…